Vulnerable: open to, or be liable to be hurt by criticism or attack. (1968 edition of The New World Dictionary of The American Language, The Southwestern Company, Nashville, Tennessee).
I have been enslaved almost all of my life with the fear of the above word. The thought of allowing myself to be vulnerable in seeking to do what I love in life, produced a chilling fear of failing, rejection, being the topic of local conversations (gossip), people not liking me anymore, being broke and, most importantly the fear of just compassionately making the commitment to try.
I have just recently realized that it is so important for me as a leader, a father, grandfather, husband and a Christian, to have the courage to be vulnerable. The best life I have found to imitate is the life of Jesus Christ. From His birth to His death, He was always vulnerable to the world we live in. He faced it all with love and courage. Even his mother and those who closely followed Him, were openly vulnerable.
The first test of His ministry was His being vulnerable in the wilderness. He then subjected Himself to the subtle and deceptive temptations of the Devil. His vulnerability did not stop there. We have read of His speaking the will of His Father in heaven to the religious people of the time. This placed Him in a dangerous degree of vulnerability. You can and probably have already read of His courage.
His courage in overcoming the fear of being vulnerable came from loving and wanting to do the will of His Father in heaven. And He accomplished this bravely, lovingly, and perfectly. How do I know? God said He did. And suddenly a voice came from heaven, saying, ''This is My beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased.'' (Matthew 3:17, NKJV)
If we fervently and zealously seek to do the Father's will as Jesus, we will have the same courage to live vulnerably for the Master, without any fear or hesitation.
Now, I want to discuss the scriptures that surprisingly got my attention. The first one I have read all of my life and have never noticed the message that would so quickly allow me to be emancipated from the fear and battle I have from being vulnerable.
Please carefully read along. Then little children were brought to Him that He might put His hands on them and pray, but the disciples rebuked them. But Jesus said, "Let the little children come unto Me, and do not forbid them, for such is the kingdom of heaven." (Matthew 19:13-14, NKJV) What is it that jumps out at you?
Have you noticed when your children or your grandchildren began to talk and put sentences together, how bold they were in asking questions or talking to someone? Also they are very creative and enjoy being with others their age, but it doesn't last long. We are the ones who teach them the fear of being vulnerable. We teach them quickly to watch what they say. When they get older they realize in order for some people, even us, to like them, they have to act in a certain way to be accepted. An ego is born.
Do you think those little children heard the rebuke of Jesus's disciples? What if Jesus had not corrected them when He did? Those children would probably have never wanted to go to Jesus. Would the parents mentioned have ever tried again? The seed of feeling vulnerable was attempted to have been sown through the disciples and guess by whom? Don't you think it may have been the Devil?
Little children do not feel, nor have they developed the fear of being themselves. We teach it to them for the rest of their lives. Read what Jesus says, Therefore whoever humbles himself as this little child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. (Matthew 18:4, NKJV.) What does this mean? How many little children do you know who have a big ego or much pride? At the earliest age they do not even know what pride or ego is. Again, it is taught by us and others for the rest of their lives.
Why would Christ say we need to be humble as a little child? Before we had an ego and pride, we were humble. We didn't live to protect ourselves from the criticism of others. We subconsciously followed the pattern of others needing acceptance and fearing rejection. Our egos wanted everyone to like us and when pride was introduced we wanted the best toys, best cookie, etc. and MINE! was vocally and forcefully stated. We were taught of scarcity and not abundance. So therefore as we got older, we fiercely protected what was ours. We cared not to lose our ego, pride or "toys". Thus vulnerability was introduced along with the fear to hide it.
So, we adults have to be humble like very young children. With years of life behind us, living in the fear of rejection and toiling to be accepted, we now read that Christ wants us to erase this out of our habits and subconscious mind to be humble. How does He want us to do this? Does He tell us how. Oh yes. But are you ready for it?
These, I believe are the scriptures He uses to instruct us how. But you have to know where you are now. Have you built up an ego along the way that tries to please everyone to get acceptance? Has this caused you to give up your values? Your courage? Your dreams? What has your pride done to you lately? Are you afraid of making yourself vulnerable?
Read these and see what he is asking and why. "For whosoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whosoever loses his life for My sake will find it". (Matthew 16:25, NKJV) To me if I try to save my life, my pride and ego, I will lose it. I will not allow myself to be vulnerable. I will compromise my values to appease my peers, who I feel like I so desperately need. I will say the words I think they want to hear.
Another scripture that goes along with the above is, He who loves his life will lose it, and he who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life'. (John 12:25, NKJV) God created me to be Rick Hepler. He has given me talents to use for His purpose. I do not know what the commentaries say about this verse, but if I love my life of impressing my peers, doing and living a life of pleasing others not God, I lose that life Rick Hepler was created to be.
If I have the courage to be vulnerable and live as Christ has commanded me to live, that fake life I was living, instead of who I was created to be, will fade away. I will then be living the purpose I was created for. I will have the courage to be vulnerable in serving God the way He has commanded. My Ego and pride will cease to be what drives my life.
When I have the courage to be vulnerable to criticism, rejection, and disappointment in serving God and spreading the gospel, Christ will not be ashamed of me when He comes. (Luke 9:26) Yes, Christ's vulnerability to live and teach the truth, love, and will of the Father in heaven, resulted in His death.
Jesus, by His example, has shown me how to have the courage to seek not after the glory of the world, (Matthew 4:8-10) but the glory He regained when He went back to the Father in heaven. (John17:5)
The Bible shows us other examples of courage and fear dealing with personal vulnerability. Peter would have been the last person I would have pictured fearing vulnerability. Yet he did it three times, even when he said he would never be made to stumble. (Matthew 26:33-35) When Peter was warming beside the fire with people of the world, his courage left him and at that moment he cared more of what they thought of him than Christ.
You and I have been placed in similar situations when we feared the rejection of the world by our decisions to speak up for the truth of the Christian values we have believed in. Sometimes I have remained silent and inactive in these particular situations. Will God forgive me and still use me in His service for this? Yes He will. What can I do? Just do what Peter did. (Matthew 26:75) Did Christ ever use him again? Do you remember reading about the first Gospel sermon? Who preached it? What did he preach? (Acts chapter 2)
He will use us also, if we weep for having given in to the fear of what other people think of us when we follow Jesus. That weeping, as Peter did, produces repentance. For godly sorrow produces repentance leading to salvation, not to be regretted; but the sorrow of the world produces death. Peter had this godly sorrow, which lead to his salvation and introducing to thousands the path of that salvation. On the other hand, sorrow of not pleasing the world continues a never ending cycle of living to please the world thus compromising the godly values you believe in. The courage to be vulnerable is lost in appeasement of others that do not desire those same values. Spiritual death then follows for you and others under your influence.
I want to be a better leader to my family, friends, people off the street, those in jail, those in the church and those who I reach by my writings. I cannot do this if I do not have the courage to be vulnerable as Christ, while He was on this earth.
God does not only expect His people to have this courage, but He commands it. I have never read of His allowing Christians to compromise His commands to please others.
When Moses died and God told Joshua to cross over the Jordan river, leading His people to promised land, He expected him to do it. "Have I not commanded You? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go." (Joshua 1:9, NKJV)
Joshua,like Christ, was not afraid of being vulnerable in carrying out the will of God. If you and I claim to be Christians, should we do any less? Joshua had faith and 100 percent trust in God's promises. He never questioned nor was he afraid of his own vulnerability.
Joshua was told by God to take people into the promised land and possess it. What does Christ command us to do that takes courage, faith , trust and places us vulnerable to the world?
And Jesus came and spoke to them, saying, "All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth. Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you; and lo I am with you always, even to the end of the age." (Matthew 28:18-20, NKJV)
And He said to them, "Go into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature. He who believes and is baptized will be saved; but he who does not believe will be condemned". (Mark 16:15-16, NKJV)
As Christians in this country, have we done this? You may say we have. We send and support missionaries to foreign lands. That is great, but what do we do in our communities? Pay the preacher to do it? Yes we do and this is a good thing. When you and I send our money, are we not expecting them to be vulnerable for us? We think this relieves us of any type of personal evangelism. We say we want to be like New Testament Christian, but do we really?
The early Christian were not afraid to be vulnerable in spreading the Gospel. Some of them died doing it. To be honest, for years It made me uncomfortable. I wanted everyone to like me. My ego wanted nothing to do with it. I would just go to church every time the doors were opened. If I had died they would have said at my funeral I loved the Lord and was very faithful. I was more faithful in avoiding the vulnerability of talking to people about Christ, and fearing the rejection from people not liking what I said. Yeah, I know, very weak. What about you?
I see I need courage to be vulnerable living as God wants me to live in this fallen world. What will it look like if I do? Whose life will change because of it? How can I develop the courage to overcome this fear of being vulnerable?
How do we do this? Do we want to do this?
(To be continued)
Thanks for reading. Please send comments to rhepler52@gmail.com .
Rick Hepler
